Pain and tears..

Kerissa Lee • August 8, 2023

Dear friends,

Thank you so much for your emails, comments, and prayers regarding my last blog post. I’m sorry I left you all hanging on how it went.. Sadly, this j-tube procedure didn’t go well at all, and it was physically and mentally traumatizing. 😢 When my surgeon placed the tube while I was under anesthesia back in April, it was a different kind of tube that I’ve never had before. And we’re not sure why it happened, but it basically got stuck in the wall of my small intestine. The area was extremely raw and painful. When she and the resident tried removing this bad tube, they thought a topical lidocaine gel would be enough for the pain. She had difficulty grasping the tube with a certain tool the kit comes with, so she had to yank it out which pulled my abdominal wall and caused excruciating pain/bleeding. 😭

I’ve been through hundreds of uncomfortable procedures throughout the past 13 years, but this pain was a 10 out of 10, and I burst into tears (not normal for me at all, so this shows how bad it was..). In my head, I prayed, “Help me, God!” Sobs wracked my body, and I begged the doctors to utilize a local anesthetic with a needle around the site before they inserted the new j-tube.

They comforted me with tissues and kindly agreed to numb the area, but I was just thinking how this whole situation could have been avoided if they locally numbed the site in the first place instead of simply using a lidocaine gel before beginning the procedure. 😔

Tears kept falling even when I got home, as I was so emotionally traumatized. My mind continued to replay the nightmare that happened. It felt like I had an abdominal surgery, so I couldn’t walk well and had to stoop for several days.

During that time, I just wished I didn’t have to have a tube (since 2024 marks 10 years with one..). 🙁 But then I thought of God’s goodness. I can eat all kinds of foods now, and the tube is mainly just for medications (I used to need tube feeds and could only really tolerate soft foods by mouth like baby food pouches). If there are bad tasting supplements or meds, I can just flush it down my tube. 🙂 Whenever I have sepsis and am too sick to swallow pills, the nurses can use my tube.

Even though it was a very hard and traumatic day, I’m so thankful for God’s grace carrying me past that. Like the verse above that I lettered, I was feeling really down mentally. I know there will be more difficult days in the future, but the Lord understands what I’m going through—I am never alone. ❤️

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Surgery Update 😊

By Kerissa Lee • August 21, 2026

Dear friends, I just wanted to thank you all so much for praying for me during my abdominal surgery on August 6th! 💚 All of your messages/emails really encouraged my heart! If you missed my previous post, I had to have an unexpected surgery to take down the jejunostomy tract and repair an enterocutaneous fistula (a rare complication from having a j-tube for 12 years). I truly felt your prayers, and the Lord answered so many of them as well! 🥹 My surgeon only had to remove about 1 1/2 inches of my small intestine which is great news! I was in the hospital for 4 days because my blood pressure was low and pain control was rough (it’s a long story, but pain management is complex due to a specific medication I take daily at home..). But aside from that and having an allergic reaction to the surgical glue, I’ve been healing well. Thank you again for praying!! God has been so faithful throughout this journey. I got a visit from my sweet foster nephew when I was in the hospital (2nd picture)! 🥰 I can’t wait until I can show you his face—he’s so adorable. 🩵 I’ve mentioned this before, but an important medication I take causes severe insomnia (still not falling asleep until anywhere between 3 AM-9 AM). 😞 But I saw my naturopath this past Monday, and she’s going to treat me for suspected cortisol spiking up during the night (which disrupts the body’s circadian rhythm). I’m thankful for the wisdom God gives her, and I’m excited to see if this treatment will help! It will take 6 weeks to see if there’s any benefit, but I first have to specially order it..

August 6th Surgery Prayer Requests 💚

By Kerissa Lee • August 6, 2026

"God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble." -Psalm 46:1

Another surgery 😞

By Kerissa Lee • July 25, 2026

Hi, friends, I thought I wouldn’t be posting for a while since I’ve been doing really well, but I’ve hit a bump in the road again and would appreciate your prayers. 💚 This past Tuesday the 21st, after nearly 12 years living with it, I had my jejunostomy tube removed completely. I thought it was going to be a simple process and that the stoma (hole) would close quickly within 30 minutes like they said. That didn’t happen, though, as the stoma started draining a ton! I couldn’t even leave the lobby and had to go back up to the clinic on the 8th floor to have an ostomy bag placed to collect all the small intestinal digestive juices that continually drained. Unfortunately, I’m experiencing a very rare complication called an enterocutaneous fistula. 🥺 I’m disappointed this is happening, but I’m not exactly surprised since my whole medical case with Mitochondrial DNA Depletion Syndrome has been rare from the very beginning.. I also don’t heal well due to connective tissue problems from Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome (case in point: my port site issues back in May when I had to have a new one surgically placed on the other side of my chest).. 😞 The clinic told me to keep emptying the ostomy bag and monitor the output. It wasn’t a fun 2 days. This whole process has definitely made me so grateful to God that I’ve never needed something like an ileostomy! TMI, but I lost almost a whole pound of fluid because so much was gushing/spurting out of the stoma every time I ate or drank. Losing so many electrolytes, I started experiencing symptoms of dehydration—weakness, high heart rate, and headaches. So yesterday, I had to go back and see the surgery resident who basically placed another j-tube (it was so painful again!). 😭 This is a temporary “plug,” and I’m bummed to say that I have to go to the operating room to have the jejunostomy tract taken down and the fistula repaired. This surgery will be happening as early as next week (it depends on my surgeon’s schedule).. She said it will be complex, especially because adhesions (scar tissue) form when a person has multiple abdominal surgeries.. I lost count what number this surgery/procedure will be, but I do know I’ve had more than 20! 😞 I know God is with me wherever I go and will supply me with the strength to endure yet another surgery like he always does. But, I’m still sad that I have to have more incisions added to my body. I shared the lyrics to this song before on an old blog post (the song is called It Is Well With My Soul by Matt Redman), but it immediately came to mind again when I was thinking of scars. As the song below said, it’s a reminder to me that my scars can be a testimony to others of God’s grace in my life and how he has brought me through every single pain and sorrow. In the Bible, I’ve always thought it’s so neat that Jesus still had his scars after he rose from the dead—he had a new body, and yet, his scars were still visible. ❤️ Our scars are a sign of grace in our lives Oh Father, how You brought us through When deep were the wounds And dark was the night The promise of Your love, You proved Now every battle still to come Let this be our song It is well (it is well) With my soul (with my soul) It is well, it is well with my soul