So much to process.

Kerissa • March 25, 2017

“Sometimes when we get overwhelmed

we forget how big God is.”

-A.W. Tozer

Hey everyone,

I’m more than halfway through my 5 weeks of IV iron infusions….but I’m still very exhausted. I woke up at 4 pm today because yesterday was so rough—my blood sodium and magnesium levels were pretty low which made me so weak.  My blood sugar yesterday also dropped…..my hands shook terribly from it, and I was nauseated.  Because I had to wake up early for an appointment, the mito fatigue made me not be able to empty my bladder numerous times throughout the day which was just plain agony….  TMI, but I’m just being real here. This is just a little of what happened yesterday.

My achy back and headaches are sadly no better, either, and I still have to take my really strong pain medication every single day that my palliative care dr. prescribes.  I wish I didn’t have to because the side effects make my muscles heavy and everything gets so loud to my hearing.

I’m faithfully taking the CBD oil, too, but I haven’t noticed a single thing yet. Will be having another phone appointment with the San Diego naturopathic physician sometime in the future to tell her how it’s going.

I had a follow-up with my palliative care doctor recently, and I learned that he is leaving OHSU in June after working there for 20 years!!  I’m so sad that he’s leaving, but I’m happy for him as well—he will be working for a very famous surgeon/writer in Boston.  His name is Atul Gawande, and I have read many of his books because they are so good!!  My palliative dr. will be the director of the hospice/palliative program there.  He wasn’t expecting to be chosen, but I’m not at all surprised because he is so very compassionate, reflective, and kind.  I get to see him one last time in May.

My monthly GI appointment was last week.  I lost weight, so I have to try and increase my tube feedings even more….he ordered a feeding pump backpack for me so that I can do tube feeds when I go out and not just do it when I’m at home.  If I can’t maintain my weight, my GI dr. said he’ll have to increase the calories in my IV nutrition when I see him again next month.

I also saw my pulmonary dr. afterwards.  He still thinks my chronic cough is upper airway-related versus lung-related, so he’s glad I see my ENT doc on April 10th.  My respiratory muscle strength is stable, so that’s a praise.

My kidney/bladder ultrasound that I had recently shows that the pressure from my neurogenic bladder causes my right kidney to get dilated.  I saw my urologist yesterday to follow-up on this, and she stated with great concern that I’m right on the edge for my bladder to stop working.. This means I will have to have a major surgery done to protect my kidneys…..she doesn’t know exactly when I will need this.  I hope and pray it happens years from now or never at all..

After waiting 2 whole weeks, my bone density results finally came back.  Sadly, it shows that I have osteopenia (soft bones/bone loss)….no wonder I fractured a rib from coughing!  I’m only 24, and I have osteopenia…. But it’s due to a number of factors.  It’s because I’m small, on IV nutrition, not active from the muscle weakness/fatigue, etc.  My PCP wants my GI dr. to greatly increase the calcium in my IV nutrition, for me to keep faithfully taking my vitamin D, and I also might need IV calcium infusions and/or liquid calcium through my j-tube.

Mitochondrial disease is simply horrible.  It affects too much. I look so normal on the outside, and yet, on the inside…

Sometimes, everything seems so hopeless and gets more and more discouraging with bad news on top of bad news…..but Jesus is my Hope and Strength.  He will ALWAYS be!!  He knows what I’m going through.  He cares.  So I won’t let all this get me down!

John Calvin once wrote, “It is the word of God alone which can first and effectually cheer the heart of any sinner.  There is no true or solid peace to be enjoyed in the world except in the way of reposing upon the promises of God.”  So encouraging!

By Kerissa Lee April 16, 2026
Hi, friends, I just wanted to write an update on what’s happened since my last post. Sadly, the 2 different tube changes haven’t helped, and there’s still so much leaking around the tube. 🙁 The abdominal pain was decreasing each day, but for some reason, it has ramped up again and has been steadily getting worse the last several days. The pain is sharp and throbbing—it also hurts to use my abdominal muscles. I saw my primary care dr. this past Friday, and he ordered an urgent CT scan. I had that done this past Monday, and the scan shows that the balloon on the tube is lodged in my abdominal wall (it’s called buried bumper syndrome). 😥 So painful, but I’m thankful for answers! I actually had this issue many years ago, and usually, changing the tube size helps. But we’ve already tried 2 different tube sizes in March which hasn’t helped. I don’t know if the tract got damaged or what.. My PCP messaged the surgery team twice now, but they’re not responding still. Ever since my general surgeon left OHSU 2ish years ago to practice in New Orleans, it hasn’t been a good transfer to a different team. 😢 In addition, the CT scan also revealed that I have ground glass opacities in my left lung, so I have to go through work-up for that as well to figure out the cause.. Aside from these latest issues, I’m praising God that my mitochondrial disease has been stable still!! So thankful for God’s grace and faithfulness. The day I got my CT results, I read this excerpt below from one of Joni Eareckson Tada’s daily devotionals, and it was like the Lord was speaking right to my heart. I hope it’s an encouragement to you. ❤️ “Present pain and afflictions tend to heighten future joy. When is peace the sweetest? Right after the conflict. When does a cold drink taste best? When you’ve become very thirsty. When do you appreciate rest the most? After hours of hard labor. When is joyful company most pleasant? After enduring long days of loneliness. The truth is, our recollection of past sufferings may one day enhance the bliss of heaven. Eternity with the Lord will be so much more heavenly to those of us whose faith has been tested, battered, and tried, time and again.” -Joni Eareckson Tada One more thing.. I’d really love prayers for my uncle (my dad’s older brother). He’s been very sick in the neuro ICU with serious issues. First pneumonia, then bacteria in his spine which later broke his back. He had a major spinal surgery but still can’t move his legs. 🥺 On top of that, his kidneys started failing, so he had to be placed on continuous dialysis. He also had to be put on a ventilator due to fluid in his lungs. Then, he still couldn’t breathe well, so he had to get a tracheostomy tube placed in his neck. 🥺 Despite all this, he and his family are so strong and trusting the Lord which is a huge testimony to all of us and to the ICU. Could you please pray for peace, strength, and healing over his body? I know he and his family would be so grateful for your prayers. 💙 P.S. I wish I could show you my foster nephew’s sweet face in this photo from Easter Sunday! He is now 9 months old—the most precious and adorable little boy!! Our lives are so much sweeter with him in it. 🥹
By Kerissa Lee March 31, 2026
Dear Dr. Phillips, There aren’t enough words to express how thankful I am to have had such an amazing GI doctor like you these past 13 years. I think of all the hard challenges that have happened starting at age 20 and beyond: experiencing GI dysmotility, not being able to eat “normal” foods without terrible abdominal pain/distention, only tolerating soft consistencies like baby food pouches (which was not fun as a 22 year old!), needing an NJ tube placed down my nose, having a jejunostomy tube surgically placed, then no longer tolerating tube feeds, dropping down to 77 pounds, getting admitted the day after Christmas to start TPN, being surprised by the extremely high copper levels on my liver biopsy and starting treatment for that, going through septic shock which caused ischemic hepatitis (remember when my liver function test was 1674!), having sepsis 5 other times from multiple central lines and ports, requiring urgent surgery to remove my gallbladder, needing D10 added to my IV fluids for numerous mitochondrial crashes, and much more. Through all the highs and lows, you were there for me, and I truly feel like I hit the “doctor jackpot” to have had a GI specialist as caring, compassionate, knowledgeable, and kind as you. I shed quite a few tears to my chagrin at my last in-person appointment with you in February 2026, and I still do as I reminisce and write this letter. But, they aren’t just tears of sadness. They are also tears of gratitude—I know this journey would have been much more difficult if I didn’t have your wonderful care and support all these years. I’m so happy that I was able to get off of TPN back then after 5 years of being on it. Not only that, but I’m so thankful that I can eat orally to my heart’s content without pain and abdominal distention. I know that’s in part due to you, so thank you. From the bottom of my heart, thank you so very much for caring for me. I will never forget you, and I wish you all the best as you start your retirement. :’) With immense gratitude, Kerissa
By Kerissa Lee March 17, 2026
"God is always doing more than we know, working toward a good we will one day rejoice in." -Lysa Terkeurst